[Most Recent Entries]
Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in
[ << Previous 20 ]
[ << Previous 20 ]
|Wednesday, October 20th, 2010|
|Writer's Block: Torn between two lovers
The simple answer is "No."
The not-so-simple answer is that, in that this question is a bit vague, there are a lot of permutations that I could wander off on in response. Have I been infatuated with more than one woman at a time? Sure. M'Lady Blue and her Shadow while I was in Highschool come immediately to mind. Of course, that's nothing compared to how easily fragmented my attention gets these days. There's always a primary person, though; the one out of the crowd of temptations that I would prefer given the choice.
Unsurprisingly, she's never the one I get. I have a gift for setting my sights on women who are for whatever reason unattainable by me. Current Mood: determined
|Tuesday, October 19th, 2010|
|Writer's Block: MAKE IT STOP!
I've got Stone Sour's new "Haunt Me" stuck in my head. I don't know enough of the song besides the chorus for it to be much more than a lot of mumbling before '..say you'll haunt me!'...and then back to mumbling. Current Mood: tired
|Tuesday, July 6th, 2010|
May the Wages of the Sword be Kind...
So, my writing has come to a grinding halt. While I continue to harbor this (somewhat delusional) dream of one day being a professional author, I find my motivation to do the work that is involved in writing novels and even short stories has waned to the point of non-existence. It's not that I don't still have ideas that I think would make good stories, but rather that the prospect of struggling to turn said ideas into printable reading material is just too intimidating to contemplate. My years of studying the market, investigating how the business of writing works and educating myself on proper writing structure and technique have somehow managed to effectively murder my enjoyment of the art. I've tried writing just for the fun of it, but that isn't honestly what I've ever done: I've always written with an audience in mind, always created stories with the expectation of having a separate reader. As such, even when I'm supposed to be just writing for me, I find myself consistently dissatisfied with my own work, convinced that “Nobody will want to read this shit.”
So far, all I've been able to manage is the occasional scrawling of an idea here and there and my intermittent journal entries (not that those are hard to do; I always have something to bitch about). The further, time-wise, I get from my ideas, the more stagnant they seem to me, to the point that I can't be bothered to work on an old idea because I am no longer convinced its feasible. My ancient Samrahad series is a good example of this; although that world plagues my conscience constantly, I can't seem to restructure the story into something that doesn't just piss me off with it's hackneyed-ness. Other concepts dissuade me with their level of complication or required research, like Loki's Legacy or my homage to H.P. Lovecraft.
I can only assume at this point that I've become so far removed from the written word that I may never realize this dream I've clung to since the age of 13...and I really can't fathom what it would take to get back on track. Or, more to the point, I don't think I have what it takes to get back to the point that writing professionally would ever be on the horizon.
...may my next step never be my last. Current Mood: frustrated
|Tuesday, June 22nd, 2010|
May the Wages of the Sword be Kind...
It's been a while since I tried to seriously journal the wild meanderings in my head, the broken trail of profound epiphanies, puerile imaginings and abject insanity that make up my thought process. Even as I begin now, I find myself remembering why I've been avoiding the process: it's exhausting.
I haven't said anything yet and I'm already fatigued by the effort to wrestle my thoughts into something cohesive.
My friend's Vixen and the Lady Vermilion have made a point of saying, to paraphrase, “it's my blog, I'll write what I like and if you don't like what I'm writing, don't read it”. In my own case, I had oft found myself using the excuse that “nobody wants to hear this” to avoid writing. As of this particular journal entry, I am going to do my best to break that particular habit; after all, blogs shouldn't really be written for the pleasure of others, but as a form of catharsis for writer. Bearing that in mind, however, I feel I should warn any potential readers that if they aren't prepared to wade through my own peculiar form of introspection, they should bother reading what I have to say in my journal.
Here be Monsters.
I've had occasion recently to review my romantic inclinations, examining the flaws in my thought processes and often finding new failings I hadn't previously identified. Between the encouragement of my co-workers and the unexpected upgrade to 'attractive' on my profile at OkCupid, I've developed a sort of ephemeral confidence that tends to evaporate like mist in the sunlight of circumstances with romantic potential. It'll be no surprise to anyone that's known me for some time that, on the surface, I have bankrupt sense of self worth and all the confidence of a weasel without his rue. (bonus points for citing the reference) However, I have recently discovered, beyond cowardice and self-disgust, that there is yet another reason why I fail to act.
Somewhere along the way in my development, I appear to have developed the ridiculous notion that I should be the one approached, rather than be the approacher. How this concept emerged to contaminate my personality I cannot guess; although in recent years, the playing field of dating has leveled somewhat in this respect, during my formative years it was still an expectation that the male would be the instigator of romance for the most part. So, whence came this concept into my personal vision of the world? And furthermore, does not this idea conflict with my presupposition of my own undesirability?
Knighthood preserve me, how did my psyche end up as such a charlie-foxtrot?
Now, I don't think the expectation here is that women should be throwing themselves at me; even my dysfunctional ego never quite runs that wild. I think where the true failing point here is that I seem to expect overt signals of attraction that would prompt me to act. The irony in that is that, not only are women not prone to making their desires that easily known, but according to a number of experts on the subject, I am unfortunately completely oblivious to all but the very most blatant signs of attraction. Oddly enough, I often misinterpret simple kindnesses and courtesies as the very signals I fail to recognize.
Maybe I should build myself a monastery and just be done with it. Nah. That would be too much like giving up. Surely while there is breath in the body, there is hope, thin hope though it may be.
And now back to your regularly scheduled reality.
...may my next step never be my last.
Current Mood: hopeful
|Tuesday, April 27th, 2010|
Feoh; Draig-Athar( r )
May the Wages of the Sword be Kind...
Goals are ephemeral things at best. Joining motivation to inspiration is rather like trying to farm for fog or herd cats. I suppose it's hardly to be unexpected that after so many years of lackadaisical efforts, that I should find it so difficult to recover my momentum. My attempts to correct all my failing paths at once don't allow for much progress in any one direction at a time. My forward momentum has been all but glacial, owing as much to my own innate capacity for laziness as to external distractions.
So...I sit here at my place of sanctuary from my own weaknesses, listening to the Phantom of the Opera, trying valiantly to regroup and channel my current burst of energy into something resembling a constructive outlet. After a review of my many begun but unfinished or unpolished works, I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed by the prospect of how involved and numerous my prospective rewrites are. Though I've made inroads towards straighten out my lifestyle into a healthier pattern, but I always feel as though I'm doing too little far too late. And of course, trying to maintain the house while also trying to organize into a maintainable arrangement is slowly proving an exorcise in madness.
Well, there's no point in dwelling on the work ahead; staring at it will not complete it any faster. Time to lower the head and lay on.
...may my next step never be my last.
|Tuesday, June 2nd, 2009|
|Ah...another pointless list
I haven't done one of these in a while, so...
Borrowed from ladytara of deviantArt fame:
1. whats your name spelt backwards?
2. What did you do last night?
Worked...then viewed a number of videos on thatguywiththeglasses.com
3. The last thing you downloaded onto your computer?
Ummm...the free mmorpg Neo Steam, I think.
4. Have you ever licked a 9 volt battery?
I think so...long time ago though.
5. Last time you swam in a pool?
I think when I was in the Army. Drown proofing...during which, ironically, I almost drowned because I can't swim.
6. What are you wearing?
t-shirt and sweatpants.
7. How many cars have you owned?
2...3 if you count the fact that I'm still a co-signer on my wife's car.
8. Type of music you dislike most?
death metal...all that screaming doesn't appeal to me.
9. Are you registered to vote?
Nope...I'm afraid of jury duty.
10. Do you have cable?
Technically yes...we cancelled it with out cable company over a year ago, but they still haven't cut off our service.
11. What kind of computer do you use?
Mostly a desktop, although I have a notebook too.
12. Ever made a prank phone call?
Naw...I don't even like talking on the phone when I actually have something to say.
13. You like anyone right now?
I'm not really sure how to answer this anymore.
14. Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving?
No thanks...even as miserable a person I am, I prefer not taking stupid chances with meeting the great beyond early.
15. Furthest place you ever traveled?
16.Do you have a garden?
Not persay, but we do have a couple of plants growing around the house.
17. What's your favorite comic strip?
18. Do you know all the words to the national anthem?
Eh...most of them.
19. Shower, morning or night?
Afternoon usually, since I work an evening shift.
20. Best movie you've seen in the past month?
I don't think I've watched any new movies in the last month.
21. Favorite pizza toppings?
Pepperoni and mushrooms
22. Chips or popcorn?
Garden Salsa Sunchips
23. What cell phone provider do you have?
24. Have you ever smoked peanut shells?
Is that even possible?
25. Have you ever been in a beauty pageant?
26. Orange Juice or apple?
27. Who were the last people you sat at lunch with?
28. favorite chocolate bar?
29. Good band?
30. Last time you ate a homegrown tomato?
Probably when I was really young at my gradparents house.
31. Have you ever won a trophy?
I won a couple writing awards when I was younger and got a couple of lesser awards in the Army, but nothing particularly impressive.
I'm not really sure.
33. Favorite computer game?
For content, Planescape: Torment; for constant carnage, Titan Quest.
34. Ever ordered from an infomercial?
35. Sprite or 7-UP?
36. Have you ever had to wear a uniform to school/work?
37. Last thing you bought at Walgreens?
I don't think we even have any of those around here.
38. Ever thrown up in public?
Not that I can recall.
39. Would you prefer being a millionaire or finding true love?
Well, both really...but I imagine I'd be happier being poor and having true love than being a millinaire and being despised, yanno?
40. Do you believe in love at first sight?
Yes...but I don't think it happens but once a century or so.
41.Can exes just be friends?
Sure...although I think this should have said "can exes be friends, neither wanting to strangle each other, nor wanting to bone."
42. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital?
I don't think I've ever visited anyone in the hospital. Last time I was in one, it was for my own health.
43. Did you have long hair as a young kid?
Yeah...my highschool graduation picture tells the tale.
44. What message is on your voicemail machine?
45. Where would you like to go right now?
Borders...or maybe Starbucks. Borders never makes their chai strong enough...but the ambiance is much more conducive to intellectual pursuits.
46. What was the name of your first pet?
Bandit. yes, I named my first dog after the dog from Johnny Quest.
47. What kind of back pack do you have, and what's in it?
I have two...one for work that's full of books, a small pharmacy and a number of odds and ends to keep me busy during downtime; the other is my writing bag, which has my Dell notebook and all its little accoutraments.
48. Last incoming/outgoing call on your phone?
I don't know...I deleted my history last night.
49. What is one thing you are grateful for today?
Not completely broke.
50. What do you think about most?
Story ideas...and passionate interludes with women who have no interest in me. And sometimes a combination thereof. Current Mood: complacent
|Thursday, May 28th, 2009|
Every once in a while, a fragment of a song slivers itself into my brain. Sometimes it's a new song (Damn you, Lady Gaga!), but more often than not it's an older song that I pull out of the archives to hear again. Such is the case here:
...There was a time when nothing ever really mattered
There was a time when there was nothing I didn't know
There was a time when I knew just what I was living for
There was a time and the time was so long ago
There was a time and the time was so long ago...
And I never really sleep anymore
"It Just Won't Quit"
Written by Jim Steinman
Performed by Meatloaf Current Mood: depressed
|Thursday, April 9th, 2009|
|What Big Cat Are You?
Current Mood: sleepy
|You Are a Snow Leopard|
|You have learned that you must rely on yourself, and yourself alone, to live a happy life.|
You are understand the world better than most people you know. You are very perceptive and intuitive.
You need lots of space to think. If you don't get the space you need, you're likely to bite someone's head off.
Because you are so thoughtful and solitary, people find you to be intense and mysterious. You're even seen as intimidating.
|Monday, March 30th, 2009|
May the Wages of the Sword be Kind…
It has been a strange sort of week. In the short span of 7 days, I received my Futhark ring back from repairs (for free!) at the Enchanted Glyph, Rose won free tickets to Stephen Lynch’s concert at the Warner Theatre, I got word my sister officially left her fiancé, Rose’s best ‘friend’ moved into our immediate area…and my Uncle Tom passed away from complications resulting from pancreatic cancer.
Can you say “mixed signals”? I knew you could. My mother likes to typify our family’s luck as a balancing act, or as she puts it “never the sweet without the bitter” and the past week seemed proof of the putting. On the very same day I received the word that my Uncle had died and my sister had fled the dysfunctional situation with her now ex-fiance, Rose called me at work to tell me that she’d just received word that she had won tickets to see Stephen Lynch, one of our favorite musical comedians. Under the circumstances, I had trouble being particularly enthusiastic about it, but I am happy we went. In spite of the number of drunken hecklers, Stephen and his compatriots put on a very good show and I got the laughs I needed to break up some of the numbness that I was feeling.
Thanks Stephen…you’re brand of totally inappropriate comedy really helped make my day.
Anyway, that brief respite didn’t completely evaporate my concerns over my Uncle’s passing. I haven’t seen most of my extended family in almost ten years and I don’t think I’ve seen Uncle Tom and his family for better than fifteen years. My mother suggested I send something along in the way of condolences or sympathy and, dutiful son that I am I found myself buying a simple sympathy card at Walmart last night: nothing enormously sappy or religious in content, but having a sufficient amount of emotion for my purposes. Now, I find myself at a loss at what to add to it of my own feelings. Do I just sign it and let the card doing all the talking for me or should I add something else to make it more personal? I’ve never had to do this sort of thing before and frankly I find myself at a loss. How do you tell some one you never really knew that you’re sorry that some one you can barely remember is gone from their lives?
This is going to be a lot more complicated that I expected.
In the meantime, I’ve much work to do on myself; my mother wants me to get tested for pancreatic cancer, as that’s what had managed to kill both my Grandfather and my Uncle in the span of three years. To be honest, I’m not in a rush to get back to the doctor after all the cholesterol medication she’s been throwing at me, but I guess I’ve got to go back and face the music eventually. I have made a point over the past few weeks to be more active, now that I’ve abandoned my medication due to the unpleasantness of its side affects. I can’t say I’ve sufficiently changed my diet to make an enormous amount of difference though. Add to that the number of unexplained pains that have been plaguing me lately and my anxiousness about going to the doctor again increases ten fold.
No news isn’t always good news, but it’s generally easier to deal with than bad news.
I also continue pouring writing into my brain as I try to recoup my lost years of not significantly reading and writing that I tend to blame my lack of writing motivation on. Truly, I suspect the reason I got into writing in the first place was because I had almost nothing else better to do in my youth; I had few friends and none of those I had lived anywhere near me and my parents weren’t of the means to buy things just to keep a teenager busy, so I had to manage on my own. Now, with so much else to occupy my time, both reading and writing have become very secondary pursuits in my life, though I still give both as much time as I can; reading at work during my downtime and going out of the house to write in environments that can sometimes inspire me to do so.
Lots to do, loads to think about and very little motivation to spread amongst it all.
The story of my life, it seems.
…may my next step never be my last. Current Mood: numb
|Tuesday, March 3rd, 2009|
Have you ever gotten a set of song lyrics locked in you memory for years, only to discover later that they're not only misquoted, but not even from the same song? For my own part, these lyrics have been stuck in my head for something like fifteen years:
“I'm flyin' high over grape fields, my feathers long and black/one step forward, two steps back.”
I've been convinced for years that those were the lyrics to a Bruce Springsteen song, but after a few minutes of research today I discovered just how wrong I was.
The first line proved to be misquoted from Bruce's “My Beautiful Reward”, wherein 'grape' was actually 'gray', while the second was the titular line from a Johnny Winter (although Bruce did do a song with a similar titular line, “One step up”).
Strangely, I'm more comfortable with the misquoted, misplaced lines my brain mashed together than the songs they were gleaned from; I have often liken myself to a shadowy figure traveling far and wide without getting closer to any destination, so this unconscious error seems to have become a conscious mirror to how I see myself.
Anybody else manage something like this that might have etched itself permanently in their head?
Raven Current Mood: weird
|Thursday, February 26th, 2009|
|Shingles and Writer's Impotence
Thus far, this year has not proved as auspicious as I might have hoped. My efforts to better myself have resulted in little net worth in light of the challenges that lie ahead; to make matters worse, more complications insist on revealing themselves as time goes on. Housing arrangements, health problems and the ever-present fiscal challenges (only made worse by the current economic atmosphere) continue to wear at my resolve, resulting in my reticence to do much of anything constructive. Between the shingles I was diagnosed with yesterday and the shadow of impending struggles in the housing market, I've essentially blown off my whole mid-week weekend by either sleeping or playing computer games.
Looking back now at the end of the two full days off, I can't help but be disappointed that the only thing I've accomplished is putting off an appointment with a real estate agent and finishing a third rewrite on one of my short stories.
Not exactly boast worthy for 48 hours of downtime.
I'm finding that motivation to write, specifically new ideas and closure of old ones, is proving ever more difficult generate, in spite of my recent glut of reading (including the very surreal Nightside Series by Simon R. Green and the somewhat more structured Dresden Series by Jim Butcher). Usually, reading invigorates my writing spirit, but lately I get the impression I'm trying to charge a dead car battery with a series of 9 volt cells. Each time I sit down to put my images and ideas to words, all I seem to get is superficial drek.
Perhaps, after I'm done with my first battery of Dresden books, I'll switch to something written more intricately; I haven't read any of George Martin's other works, so perhaps I'll see what he's done in other genres before A Dance of (for?) Dragons comes out (should it ever actually come out).
Oh, and by the way, shingles hurts. Constantly, distractingly, frustratingly, it hurts. I'm hoping the anti-viral that my doctor gave me will really do something about this; Rose did some research of her own and found that shingles can progress into permanent nerve damage under which the pain never stops. Yeah, not looking forward to that prospect.
Another week gone by, another two days off, but at least this has been a bit more productive. We've managed to get a better impression of our financial situation in perspective with our intent to purchase a house. While our initial hopes were somewhat dampened by the difficulty it would involve to get the house we are actually considering, there are yet possibilities to consider. However, I don't relish the idea of the struggles ahead: wrestling with our current landlord, struggling to make the finances work, to say nothing of making the move itself.
But, such are the way of things when aspirations out-pace one's immediate means.
I've managed to do a little writing, aside from this journal; reading The Alchemist's Son series of books inspired me to take up my childhood story about the Pits. Like most of my stories, it seems to evolve every time I go back to work on it, but at least the players (all loosely based on friends and acquaintances from my youth) have remained mostly the same. I can't help but liken the story idea to Robert Holdstock's “Mythago Wood”, which I read rather young; although I remember only small parts of the story, I can only hope that my own tale is not so influenced by Holdstock's work that I am pegged as a poor imitation.
Which, of course, I am...but the rest of the world hardly need know that.
Other story ideas continue to bounce around in my head like multi-ball mode in a pinball machine: “Wings” continues to torment me as it fluctuates in length and clarity; “The Sword's Man” haunts me with the need for a rewrite, although I fail to see exactly what to change; “Dance” and a number of my other shorts all cram together in my subconscious begging for attention. Of course, the ever present Samrahad epic, my fantastic pet project that refuses to take to print, continues to throw me the odd bone that rarely satisfies my need to make progress on it.
When I first lost the spontaneous motivation to write of my youth, it was because I believed the hard part about becoming a published author would prove to be the business of selling my work. I am now convinced that the writing itself may prove my greatest challenge. After wrestling with my own poor work habits, dealing with cut-throat editors and scabby agents should prove a piece of cake.
My day job (which, ironically, takes place at night) is proving no longer the solid foundation I hoped for either, as we've all been warned that time may be running out on our profession. So, the prospect of training to diversify my marketable skills has been added to the burden of stress upon my shoulders. No wonder I broke out in shingles; I shouldn't be surprised if I start passing diamonds out my colon.
Well...maybe rubies or sapphires.
In any case, I sense that time is not on my side on any front. There is a staggering amount of work to do and the hourglass runs short.
Current Mood: discontent
|Monday, January 5th, 2009|
|"I think I'd better think it out again..."
Memeness borrowed from odilla and falaten while I mull over my thoughts suitable for sharing in regards to the beginning of the calendar year (bonus points to the first comment that correctly sites the movie, character and song I ganked for my subject):This is the list of the top 100 grossing movies of all time. Bold what you've seen, strike out movies you never ever want to see and italicize ones you'd like to see.
Titanic (1997)The Dark Knight (2008)
Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope (1977)
Shrek 2 (2004)
E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial (1982)
Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace (1999)
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest (2006)
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith (2005)
The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003)
Spiderman 2 (2004)
The Passion of the Christ (2004)
Jurassic Park (1993)
The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)
Finding Nemo (2003)
Spiderman III (2007)
Forrest Gump (1994)
The Lion King (1994)
Shrek the Third (2007)
Iron Man (2008)
Harry Potter and the Philosopher's (Sorcerer's) Stone (2001)
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008)
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (2007)
Star Wars: Episode VI - Return of the Jedi (1983)
Independence Day (1996)
The Sixth Sense (1999)
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (2007)
The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe (2005)
Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back (1980)
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (2005)
Home Alone (1990)
The Matrix Reloaded (2003)
Meet The Fockers (2004)
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002)
The Incredibles (2004)
Dr Seuss' How The Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)Jaws (1975)
I Am Legend (2007)
Monsters, Inc. (2001)
Night at the Museum (2006)
Men in Black (1997)
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004)
Toy Story 2 (1999)
Bruce Almighty (2003)
Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)
My Big Fat Greek Wedding (2002)Ghostbusters (1984)
Beverley Hills Cop (1984)
War of the Worlds (2005)
Cast Away (2000)The Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997)
The Bourne Ultimatum (2007)
X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)
Rush Hour 2 (2001)
National Treasure: Book of Secrets (2007)
Mrs Doubtfire (1993)
King Kong (2005)
The Da Vinci Code (2006)Aladdin (1992) Saving Private Ryan (1998)
Mission: Impossible 2 (2000)
Kung Fu Panda (2008)
Alvin and the Chipmunks (2007)Austin Powers in Goldmember (2002)
Back to the Future (1985)
Wedding Crashers (2005)Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005) Ratatouille (2007)Austin Powers 2: The Spy Who Shagged Me (1999)
Batman Begins (2005)
Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991)
The Exorcist (1973)The Mummy Returns (2001)
Superman Returns (2006)Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989)
Gone With The Wind (1939)
Pearl Harbor (2001)
Happy Feet (2006)
Ice Age: The Meltdown (2006)
Toy Story (1995)
X2: X-Men United (2006)
Men in Black II (2002)
The Day After Tomorrow (2004)
Mr and Mrs Smith (2005)
Current Mood: contemplative
|Saturday, November 22nd, 2008|
|Meme offered from the outer reaches.
Cause I’m at work, on my lunch hour and vaguely bored; absconded from fala_ten, by way of penneychica.
Over 18? Dah. Current Mood: melancholy
Kissed Someone on your Friends List? Yeah; oddly enough, I’m married to her.
Danced in front of your mirror naked? Good lord no! That’d be like watching an anatomically correct muppet have an epileptic fit.
Ever told a lie? Oh yes, but managed to leave most of that in my misspent youth.
Been arrested? Never.
Kissed a picture? ~ponders~ not that I can recall.
Ran a red light? Once or twice; them buggers are tricksy sometimes.
Been suspended from school? Nope.
Totaled your car/motorbike in an accident? No way.
Sang karaoke? ~sigh~ All of twice.
Done something you told yourself you wouldn't? almost on a daily basis.
Laughed 'til what you were drinking came out your nose? Regular event.
Caught a snowflake on your tongue? Never on purpose.
Kissed in the rain? Not that I can recall.
Sang in the shower? Once in a while, if the spirit takes me.
Sat on a roof top? Hell no…heights and I don’t get along.
Thought about your past with regret? Constantly.
Broken a bone? Negatory.
Shaved your head? Never entirely.
Blacked out from drinking? Once, which I think officially mortally wounded my alcohol tolerance. It’s long since dead now.
Been in a band? Nope.
Shot a gun? Army training. Hurrah.
Liked someone with nobody else knowing about it? I sincerely doubt it.
Played strip poker? Nope…again with the muppet.
Donated Blood? Once.
Loved someone you shouldn't? Story of my life, really.
Have a tattoo? Nope…would like one someday, preferably before my body starts to look like a contoured map.
Have or had any piercings besides ears? No, my body has more than enough holes, thank you.
Made out with a complete stranger? Nope.
Skinny dipped? Wet anatomically correct muppet? No spank you.
Regret any of your exes? Dah.
|Sunday, August 17th, 2008|
|Meme mob mentality
Your result for The Elemental Balance Test...
~ 56% Water ~ 30% Wind ~ 41% Earth ~ 37% Fire ~
And I know and I believe
There's a way out to the sea of happiness
It seems your personality is in perfect harmony; your impulses are tempered with thoughtfulness, and your emotions are balanced with a healthy amount of reason.
In order to maintain that harmony, try wearing a Jade, a Chrysoprase or an Agate; all three enhance balance and stability, as does the Snowflake Obsidian that will help remain balanced during times of change.
In detail: You are more balanced than most people. Your Ground Chakra, (associated with the element of fire and representing our basic desires and driving force), your Creative Chakra, (associated with the element of </b>earth</b> and representing our need to preserve and grow), your Heart Chakra, (associated with the element of water and representing our sense of love and compassion), and your Throat Chakra, (associated with the element of wind and represents our desire to learn and communicate), appear to be on an equal footing with each others.
These are the results you will get if you score highly on...
None of the four elements: Balance Wind: Gust Fire: Blaze Water: River Earth: Valley Wind & Fire: Thunder Wind & Water: Clouds Wind & Earth: Canyon Fire & Earth: Lava Fire & Water: Tornado Water & Earth: Trees Wind, Fire & Earth: Storm Wind, Fire & Water: Stars Wind, Water & Earth: Forest Fire, Water & Earth: Avalanche All four elements: Harmony
Take The Elemental Balance Test at HelloQuizzy Current Mood: apathetic
|Friday, August 15th, 2008|
|Taking the Sheep Rout
Your result for The Perception Personality Image Test...
NBPC - The Daydreamer
Nature, Background, Big Picture, and Color
You perceive the world with particular attention to nature. You focus on the hidden treasures of life (the background) and how that fits into the larger picture. You are also particularly drawn towards the colors around you. Because of the value you place on nature, you tend to find comfort in more subdued settings and find energy in solitude. You like to ponder ideas and imagine the many possibilities of your life without worrying about the details or specifics. You are in tune with all that is around you and understand your life as part of a larger whole. You are a down-to-earth person who enjoys going with the flow.
The Perception Personality Types:
Take The Perception Personality Image Test at HelloQuizzy
|Friday, June 27th, 2008|
Okay, I’ll bite.
- Post 3 things you've done in your lifetime that you don't think anybody else on your friends list has done.
- See if anybody else responds with "I've done that."
- Have your friends cut & paste this into their journal to see what unique things they've done in their life.
Current Mood: amused
- Deified an unrequited love (going on 20 years now).
- Wrote an entire(ly crappy) space opera novel from beginning to end, by hand, in print, in a single spiral note book between the ages of 12 and 13.
- Received the go-ahead from Neil Gaiman to essentially plagiarize his ideas from American Gods into a story of my own. (Maybe he feels his copywrite lawyers need some practice?)
|Saturday, April 19th, 2008|
For those who may be interested, I've been posting the entirety of my portfolio of poetry over the past month at http://ravenstromdans.deviantart.com/ . Most of this poetry is very old, with the beginning works actually from my high school days. Current Mood: melancholy
Just thought I'd pass that along.
Good Journey to all.
|Wednesday, April 16th, 2008|
|The sheep go marching one by one...
Well...this is certainly an eye opener. ~blink~ My Personality
|You feel enraged when things do not go your way. You are sensitive about being treated fairly and feel resentful and bitter if you think you are being cheated, however you tend to lack energy and have difficult initiating activities. You are not prone to spells of energetic high spirits. You prefer familiar routines and for things to stay the same. You can tend to feel uncomfortable with change. You do not like to claim that you are better than other people, and generally shy from talking yourself up, however you generally see others as selfish, devious, and sometimes potentially dangerous. Your sense of duty and obligation is average and although you are mostly responsible you can sometimes be unreliable.|
|Take a Personality Test now or view the full Personality Report.|
The best Buying Pet Gifts.
I never would have guessed I was THAT neurotic. Current Mood: surprised
|Thursday, April 3rd, 2008|
|Contibuting to the mob mentality
1. ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet, current car): Bandit Saturn
2. GANGSTA NAME: (fav ice cream flavor, favorite Kind of shoe): Blueberry Cheesecake Duty Proof (uh...what?)
3. HIPPY NAME: (what you ate for breakfast, fav tree): Cheerio Honey Hazel (~blink~)
4. SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born): Allen Rochester
5. STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 of your first name): Barja
6. SUPERHERO NAME: (favorite color, favorite drink): Midnight Blue Tea (let all criminals quiver in fear)
7. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers/grandmothers): William Dotty
8. STRIPPER NAME: (the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent, favorite candy): Phoenix Licorice
10. TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 4th grade teacher’s last name, a city that starts with the same letter): Taylor Towson
11. SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, flower): Autumn Iris (oy, that sounds a bit girly)
12. CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now) Blueberry Sword. (hmmm...a Huckleberry Hound sidekick/spin off?) Current Mood: complacent